Confession of Kashmir Paranoia

The number one rule in travelling: follow your intuition, especially when considering safety. This is a story about how my  'intuition' lead to anxiety, paranoia, irrationality, lack of sleep, and a generally miserable experience. I don't know, and will never know if my intuition was right, only that its over and may make for a great story/ learning experience.

On October 3, I flew over the Himalayas towards the wartorn region of Kashimr.
Gazing out the window at the mountain peaks piercing the clouds, I am overwhlemed by a feeling of complete awe...

'this is going to be a really good 3 days'.
As the plane started its descent, I start looking over the pages I ripped out of a 5 year old Lonely Planet (My guidebook didn't have a chapter on Kashmir, a region it-along with the government of Canada- deemed as too dangerous). There is a box that I had overlooked: "Beware of Houseboats. Never reserve and pay for your room in advance, and beware of excessively cheap rates"... CRAP
'this is going to be a really bad 3 days'.

The 65-year old houseboat owner is waiting for me at the airport (the airport is conveniently located in the centre of an army base). We get into the taxi, and the houseboat owner starts asking me where I'm from, my plans for the weekend, and how he can organize any sort of trips that I would want, etc etc. He takes my bill from my hands, crumples it up and puts it in his pocket. I don't know what to say.
"If you need buy anything, I have cousin who owns store, best deal in all Kashmir. I will take you there"
"Not now" (he persists a little, but I don't relent)
We drive past the endless number of army bases, soldiers on every block, the sign that says "Kashmir, the most beautiful place in the world". I cannot help but think "this is quite possibly the ugliest place I have ever been" (Foreshadowing 3 days filled with misinformation, or non-information).

Not starting well. I'm filled with dread about the houseboat. As we get near the lake, I notice dirty looking houseboat after dirty looking houseboat. The boats are in the middle of the lake, and there are 1000s of them. I see each one and hope secretly "I hope thats not it"; they all look disgusting, and being trapped in the middle of a lake with a complete stranger in a strange region that is the source of consistent wars between two nuclear powers is no longer as appealing as it was 2 days earlier...

The taxi stops, I get on a little boat (shikara)

and cross the lake. I'm shown the Crown of India houseboat, and the room. The bedsheets are stained. The toilet is stained (from recent use). The boat had been beautifully designed, 40 years ago, when it was built  as luxury accomodations.

For the last 20years, the clientele has changed, as Kashmir is not exactly the hottest tourist destination (more of a hot terrorism/battle destination).

I'm on a boat in the middle of a lake with all of my posessions, an elderly man who has complete control over the situation, prying about my life, who is trying to get me to pay another 1000 rupees to go on a tour of something or other, I decline. He then offers me dinner for another 500 rupees, I decline.
-But where will you eat?
-In a restaurant?
-But they are all closed at night [a blatant lie. although I didn't know it at the time]
-So i'll eat chips
-Are you sure?
-Yes
-You don't want a tour?
-No, just take me to the shore...

I spend the next 20 minutes locking up my bag to the bed (best travel investment ever: a lock and metal mesh-netting for my pack)...

Because this is the story of paranoia, I will skip over the Srinagar touring stories (for now) and go straight to the end of the day when I have to head back to the houseboat, shaking in anxiety. The few men on the drop off area for the four neighboring houseboats all ask me "How was your wandering?"-- they all know where I was, who I am, and that I am on my own. I don't like that they have that knowledge.

I feel like a child, surrounded by adults, none of whom are familiar, all of whom seem like they want to harm me in some way. I'm all alone. Its 8pm and I attach my lock to the door of my room, after spending 30 minutes explianing to the boat owner why I don't want to pay 1000 rupees for a tour. He always seems to know when I'm in my room, even though I have no idea where he is when I show up.
...
If one is attacked or mugged during the day, at least one has some level of control and awareness of the situation. One has options. When one is asleep, there is no control. Needless to say, I don't sleep.

The highlight of the night is when I hear people in the room next to me (I didn't even know there was a room there), I am no longer the only person on the boat. Nevertheless, the light in my room stays on all night. Breakfast is edible, and followed by another sales pitch. Since nothing happened during that night, I try to feel a bit better. I spend the day convincing myself that since nothing had happened during the night, and since there were only 2 more nights to go, clearly all of this is in my head and I shouldn't worry anymore.

I have almost convinced myself when I go to the houseboat for the second night.
1)Thats when I discover a blue light bulb in the room.

In theatre, a blue bulb is used so that the actors can see in the dark, and so that the audience cannot see the actors. It essentially simulates darkness, and will illuminate a space just enough to see basic contours. An audience wouldn't notice the light; a sleeping person would NEVER notice the light.
2) Next to the lightbulb, I notice, behind a curtain, a door. A door!  WHY IS THERE A DOOR HERE? The lock that I had placed on what I thought was the only door is totally useless. (there is no lock on this new door).
3) I start checking out all of the curtains in the room. 4 large windows, the lock is broken on one of them. I go to the bathroom, ANOTHER DOOR! No lock, no latch, nothing, on any of these openings.

It doesn't help that I just realized that the bag for my malaria net has dissapeared.

Panice sets in. I have to stay here the night, I don't know where else to go. I'm trapped on a boat. I feel like a prisoner. What do I do? I decide: Forget the 1000 rupees (20$) that I've already spent for the next night, come 7am, I'm leaving. But until then, what do I do? What do I do?

Primarily out of paranoia, then out of the need to feel safe, and finally because this was ridiculously fun, I created an alarm out of toothfloss, a water bottle, swiss army knife, keys...

 

If any door was opened, the bottle and keys would rattle loudly right over my head. I tested this.

The next morning I got the hell out of there. Took a taxi to the airport. Changing tickets was too pricey. Spent the day looking for a hotel, wandering through Srinagar. Found a safe place for my last night. Watched HBO.

..........

NEXT POSTS:

"Excuse me sir, where are you from?"/ A BEAUTIFUL Tourist TRAP

Tier 3 Overnight Train/ No More Personal Space.